The rest of today will consist of salad, with salmon and an easy olive oil and lemon dressing. Some nuts and to finish out the night, a turkey burger with all the fixins. I will post those pics at a later date....if they come out looking good that is. :-)
In other news, something's I've realized about myself over the last few weeks. Life is really hard to maneuver when you are trying to please everyone. When really the only person you should work on keeping happy is yourself. I have spent most of my life on the pause button. Allowing all those circumstances around me to sort of dictate my life. Not that they have intended to, because in all honesty, I am the one who pushed the pause button so that I could be there for the ones I thought needed me. The problem is, i forgot to hit play again.. And while I appreciate the appreciation of my sacrifice (so to speak) I am beginning to realize that I am nearly 40 years old and have not yet really pursued any of the dreams I had for myself. Let alone, what God may have in store.
I spent the last few weeks looking for jobs that I thought would make those around me happy...because I love them, I do not want to disappoint them. The truth is while I am a "grown adult" and have responsibilities, I am also less fulfilled. I want more. I need more. I desire more out of life then just settling for what's expected of me. If I believe that God will take care of me and my needs, then shouldn't I know that wherever he takes me, he will also take care of those who I think "need me"?
I have been given an open door to spread my wings and check out the air, and see where it takes me...
The loss of my job has given me more peace then I have ever imagined. I have never been one to take time and examine things before doing them. I'm all about jumping in with both feet and figuring out the rest as I move along. The picture of my LIFE is just beginning. I'm ready to push play and live out my life the way it was intended. I do not want to regret one moment. And I don't, so far. But, I also don't want to resent those I care about most because I stopped everything for them and never had the opportunity to move forward for fear of disappointing them....or worse, abandoning them. If God truly has a bigger plan for me than what I am living at this moment, and now is my time to take it,shouldn't I jump through that door and believe that those who can't go with me will be taken care of? I was reminded of that several times this weekend.
Life gives you opportunity, and because you have free will, you have a choice to decide which ones you take and which ones you don't. Don't let the world around you always influence the choices you make. Sometimes, you with have to pause things for a moment, but don't forget to hit play again. Remember that you have an adventure to take. Try not to live your life through someone else's story. You are the star of your own destiny. Don't be your own supporting actor.
Push play.
Goals this week:
Spend time in prayer and meditation about my direction.
Work on a better, healthier me
Be there for those I have committed to this week and next.
Work on my audition piece for an audition coming up this weekend.
Try to remember to blog more. LOL
I will write soon. I know I still have to write about the workshop and there are a few other things I need to share. This blog was just weighing heavily on me, and I knew I had to share. If not just for my own benefit.
Much love dear ones.
Phase 1 of Dottiegate is still in progress. Man, this is a long one.
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